A History of the Lurker Nation in Briefs

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As it turned out, not all ancient races had departed from known space. The long hidden people known as the Obnoxions finally revealed themselves once the Vorlons, Shadows, and their other relatives were no longer present to hold them in check. This proved to be the turning point in the Lurker Revolution. Deuce, leader of the resistance, entreated the newly arrived Obnoxion ambassador for support of the proposed lurker nation. The ambassador was only too happy to back Lurker claims of independence and it immediately sent a strongly worded message to President John Sheridan that any attempts to overthrow The Great Lurker Nation would be regarded as a direct act of hostility against the Obnoxions. Sheridan heeded the ambassador's ultimatum rather than risk another war against an ancient race. Thus was our goal achieved and there were great celebrations as Babylon 5 security evacuated downbelow once and for all.

The Lurker leaders realized almost immediately that it was necessary to create a governing body to ensure lasting prosperity and order. Thus did the Noble Order of the Lurker Knights come into being. It was decided after much bickering and shouting that there would be formed an elite body, among whom the land within Lurker borders would be divided. Each of the more than 250 knights inducted recieved a fiefdom over which they held administrative responsibility. Deuce was unanimously elected Grand Master and was given the entire area of Brown 21 as his personal domain. Obnoxion Ambassador Aggravatx was declared an honorary member of the Lurker Knights and given as his fief a generous donation from Deuce's very own holdings; the most distinguished janitorial closet in all of Brown 21. Aggravatx was delighted and now holds all diplomatic functions within this office. Anyone on the station who wishes to speak with him must be in good standing with the Lurker Nation in order to reach him without being arrested.

Because the Lurker Nation enjoyed absolute immunity from the very beginning, it was only a matter of time before someone suggested that the Knights conduct offensive campaigns into the rest of the station. At first there was no more than petty thievery in the Zocalo, but as time went on, members of the Order and their people at arms became bolder. Events escalated after the brilliant water balloon attack against former security chief Michael Garibaldi followed by setting the console in his quarters into an unstoppable loop of TV commercials of the 20th century. Active security chief Zack Allen attempted to crack down on these actions, but all persons arrested were released from the brig at the personal request of the Obnoxion Ambassador. Frustrations among the station management grew so high that Captain Lochley sent an enraged appeal for immediate action to President Sheridan. She threatened to resign her position if he did not take direct measures regarding The Great Lurker Nation.

Sheridan himself came as a diplomat to Babylon 5 and engaged in negotiations in each fiefdom. Perhaps most notable was his encounter with Obnoxion ambassador. For an entire hour, he shouted at Aggravatx, asking what motive there could be for simply causing trouble. The ambassador remained mysteriously silent until the President finally gave up. As Sheridan was about to leave, the Obnoxion asked him "What do you feel like doing right now?" The President answered in a violent and unpolite manner that he would like to physically assault the ambassador and quickly left the station in his personal White Star class vessel. Never once did our dearest supporter waver before the demands of the large and powerful! Upon returning to his offices, a report was issued by President Sheridan with his conclusions on the matter. He felt that the Obnoxions were by nature an impulsive and unpredictable race that should be approached with care. Soon after this incident, the Lurker Knights were operating as usual throughout the station, adding with every passing day to their prestigious military tradition. Today, no power stands to bar the autonomy of The Great Lurker Nation and events will hopefully continue in this way for generations to come.